What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

How do you get a girl to like you?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

What's the most trivial thing that ever made you go to the doctor?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why do people stop working towards achieving their dreams?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Why does my mother care about my sister more than me?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

How do I get my body in shape?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Analysts revamp forecast for Nvidia-backed AI stock - TheStreet

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

How did you get to be a leftist?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

What do teens do at night?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

TEXT:

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

What is the meanest thing your husband has said to you?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Why do people hate on Serena (anime character)? What did she ever do to anyone except be a good friend to Ash Ketchum and an awesome trainer herself?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Beautiful European women were killed by inquisition but Russia was not Catholic. Is this the reason for a drastic difference explaining why Russian women are the prettiest?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …